Bring the spark back into your bedroom and your relationship with gutsy and effective advice from bestselling author Michele Weiner Davis.

It is estimated that one of every three married couples struggles with problems associated with mismatched sexual desire. Do you? If you want to stop fighting about sex and revitalize your intimate connection with your spouse, then you need this book. In The Sex-Starved Marriage, bestselling author Michele Weiner Davis will help you understand why being complacent or bitter about ho-hum sex might cost you your relationship.

Full of moving firsthand accounts from couples who have struggled with the erosion of sexual desire and rebuilt their passionate connection, The Sex-Starved Marriage addresses every aspect of the sexual libido problem:

• If you're the more highly sexed partner, you'll breathe a sigh of relief. At last someone understands your feelings about the void in your marriage. Discover why your pleas for touch have fallen upon deaf ears and why your approach to the lull in your sexual relationship could be a sexual turnoff. Most important, learn new ways to motivate your spouse to take your needs for more physical closeness to heart.
• If you're the spouse with a lagging libido, you're far from alone. You'll learn about the physiological and psychological factors, including unresolved relationship issues, that may contribute to the chill in your bedroom and what you can do to melt the ice. And if you're a man, you'll be surprised to learn that staggering numbers of men, even men whose sexual machinery works just fine, "get headaches" too!

The Sex-Starved Marriage will give you and your spouse the inspiration, encouragement, and answers you need.

Books Instructional

Romance & Techniques

Average Customer Review: ( 53 customer reviews )
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When I saw this book- great title, by the way- I bought it and read it in two days. The author describes what I've been feeling to a tee. I couldn't believe it. I asked my wife if she would read it too and she shocked me and said yes. I'm not sure what happened to her, but I can tell by her actions that the book is making an impression. She's been more affectionate and she even agreed to talk to a counselor. We're not out of the woods yet, but for the first time in a very, very long time, I have hope that things can get better and that I don't have to spend the rest of my life celibate.

131 of 134 found the following review helpful:

Excellent advice for strengthening your marriageFeb 09, 2004
By Dr. Ellen Kenner, Clinical Psychologist
"Show me a couple who has a mutually satisfying sexual relationship and I'll show you a couple I can pick out of a crowd. There's an almost visible bond between them-the gentle touches, knowing glances, laughter and warmth when their eyes meet. You can feel the connection between them." (Davis, p. 32)
How many couples miss this with their partner? Sex becomes a chronic source of tension in too many relationships. One partner has a high drive; the other one has a "leave me alone" attitude. Michele Davis offers excellent advice for those wanting to rekindle their sexual relationship and strengthen their marriage. She makes astute observations, such as noting the assumption many woman have that their husbands want sex because "having sex is like scratching an itch; it's a purely physical need." She continues,"I am convinced that one of the grossest misunderstandings about sex is the belief many women have that men desire sex because they just want, or better yet, need a physical release. It's true that men (and some women) love an occasional quickie without much emotional hoopla. However I've been privileged to hear men describe the way they really feel when their wives aren't' interested. And if you've assumed that your husband wants sex just to "get off," what I've heard will undoubtedly surprise you." (David, p. 56-7)
This book is an easy read, with plenty of relatable examples and excellent tips, i.e., sexy solutions. Davis has an excellent understanding of both partner's dilemmas and she bridges the understanding and communication gap that so often leads couples to divorce or to suffer unhappy marriages. She helps you recapture that mutually satisfying sexual relationship, and more broadly, that soulmate relationship, you may have lost with your partner.

315 of 331 found the following review helpful:

there is help!Jun 06, 2003
By Julie Carlson
I am a 38 year-old, attractive woman whose husband could care less about touching, caressing or making love to me. Until I read this book, I thought I had the only marriage in America that was a pretty much platonic. It's not that we have no sex, it's just that it is so infrequent (and always me that has to initiate) - that this makes me feel less than womanly. I don't want to spend the rest of my life in this kind of a marriage.

Now, after reading this book, I've learned that I am not alone and I am forever grateful for that. Even though other men still seem to be attracted to me, I had convinced myself that there must be something wrong with me. Now I don't think so anymore. I also learned that I've probably been doing all the wrong things to change the situation. I plan on changing my approach immediately. I get very angry and critical and I can now see how that turns my husband away. I feel much better already knowing that I have a plan. I highly recommend that anyone dealing with this issue in their marriage read this book. It's well-written and it will make you feel that the author has been hanging around your bedroom. For me, this book is a Godsend.

53 of 53 found the following review helpful:

Excellent BookFeb 22, 2003

The Sex-Starved Marriage does an excellent job of explaining each partner's position in a sexually mis-matched marriage. The book was a real eye-opener and provided insight from each partner's perspective. As a low-desire partner, it helped me gain an understanding of how my rejections over the years have affected my spouse. It made me see that as the low-desire partner, I am always setting the pace. How fair is that? I disagree with the Editorial Review which stated that Michelle got too personal in the last chapter disclosing information about her own marriage. Her disclosure made her words have more meaning because she is not only speaking from experience of dealing with couples who faced this issue, but from her experience in her own marriage. I recommend this book for any couple interested in improving their relationship, both in bed and out. Don't wait till you have a problem to read it. If you are engaged to be married, read this book now to help you prevent problems later.

62 of 64 found the following review helpful:

Finally, a book that really helps!Jun 03, 2003

If you and your spouse have been fighting about sex, don't go another day without reading this book! It gets at the heart of why couples find themselves saying and doing the same old things and never resolving the differences they feel about sex and emotional intimacy. What a relief it is to finally understand our never-ending battle about sex. My wife and I, married for fourteen years, have spent the last seven debating about our sexual relationship. It's been incredibly frustrating. I plan on following the advice in the book immediately and I will keep my fingers crossed that I can get my wife to read it when I'm done.

In regards to the reviewer who said this book was about sexual techniques- WHAT???? I'm not sure what book he was reading, but it definitely wasn't this one. This book is NOT about sexual technique at all. It is primarily about the deep relationship and emotional issues that drive couples apart and what they can do to change things. It would be great if this book were distributed when couples apply for their marriage licenses. It could cut back on the divorce rate.

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